Hot times, summer in the city

Posted on July 6, 2011 by killerfemme

XO Shirt, BCBG Skirt (from Housing Works!), Dolce Vita shoes. Shirt bought at Alter in Greenpoint, Brooklyn.

It is stating the obvious to say it gets hot in New York City in the summer. Of course it does and it’s really not that interesting to talk about it. However, when I was in college I used to avoid the city in the summer for exactly this reason. I would pack up my bags, sublet my room, and decamp to Portland, Oregon for the summer. As a result I missed the worst of the summer heat and refused to wear, or understand why anyone would wear, sandals or opened toed shoes of any kind in the city. I told my friend L.J., “That’s gross, your feet turn black, no thank you.” A lifelong New Yorker she looked at me incredulously and said, “Have you ever been on a subway platform in August?”

Now that I don’t have the luxury of extensive time off during the summer I’ve learned to embrace NYC’s sweaty pleasures like free outdoor movies and concerts, as well as good, strong air conditioning in most stores and my place of employment. Here’s a few workaday outfits, and one for weekend fun, enjoy!

etite Bateau tank top, Brooklyn Industries skirt, Dolce Vita shoes, silk scarf from Cambodia, Melville House tote

BB Dakota dress, Vintage LL Bean leather tote, Cole Haan shoes (so nautical, no?). Taken with Instagram.

H & M tank, A. Cheng skirt, Espdrilles from Paris, Les Compasantes bag. All 2006 or before, except the bag! Taken with Instagram.

Scarf: Brooklyn Industries, t-shirt:J Crew, Jeans: Madewell, Shoes: Vans, Belt: vintage. And a Ricard, bien sur!

I bought this cute floral belt on the way to the rainy pre-fourth of July backyard party I was headed to. I found it at one of my favorite vintage shops, actually probably the only vintage shop I bother to go into, in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. It’s called Seven Wonders Vintage, it’s run by a lovely young lady and you should visit.

Greetings from Asbury Park (Well, Ocean Grove)

Posted on June 28, 2011 by killerfemme

Asbury Park boardwalk at dusk

Ocean Grove at sunset

For the past few days I have been close to home, but faraway. I rented a small apartment with two of my good friends “down the shore” in New Jersey, a tranquil, two-hour train ride from Penn Station, but only a block’s walk from the beach and long from the crush of daily city life. I recently switched jobs and found out that I had to use up three days of vacation before the end of June. I called my friend L.J., who I have gone on adventures to Central Europe and Iceland with. Did she want to go somewhere for five days? Somewhere cheap and last minute? Yes! We dreamed of getting a super steal of a deal in the Caribbean, of jetting off to a quiet island for $300 apiece like the advertisements in the back of the New York Times travel section promise. However, after much research on every travel site we could find we found the deals to be far beyond our price range. We were depressed for a few instants, but then turned our sights to something closer. What did we want? Sun, sand and easy living that won’t strain our wallets. Why not the beaches of Long Island or New Jersey? We visit these beaches regularly on summer-weekend day trips and there’s no lack of cute towns. A little more research and we found our rental, in a historic community called Ocean Grove, right next to the storied Asbury Park.

Ocean Grove street at dusk

Nagle's, Main Ave, Ocean Grove

Ocean Grove is incredibly charming and full of historic, multi-colored, well-maintained Victorian summer homes. On Main Avenue is Nagle’s, a pharmacy and classic soda fountain turned restaurant where we had a burger our first night and a daily ice cream. The beach is popular without being swarmed and the boardwalk is well maintained. This is a long way from the hair gel, fist pumps and sleaze that has popularized by a certain television show. However, one thing we neglected to find out about Ocean Grove, is that it is owned by the evangelical Church. There’s regular worship services on the boardwalk, there’s a posting about daily scripture, you can’t go onto the beach before 12:30 on Sundays because you are supposed to be in church, and forget about buying alcohol. The advantage of this is the town is quiet and peaceful, the disadvantage that if you are made uncomfortable by rules, religiosity, and the sexism, homophobia and hypocrisy of the church (which we are) it feels a little… creepy.

Junot Diaz quote on the Asbury Park boardwalk

Marinere: American Apparel, Levi's shorts ("Mom shorts" found at Tucson Goodwill and cut off to be chique), Bensimon sneakers

Fortunately, not a 10 minute down the boardwalk is “sinful” Asbury Park, home of the Boss, Bruce Springstein, and the Stone Pony, the club where he got his start. The boardwalk pulses with life and on Saturday night you can hear the latest dance pop hits booming out over the water from the recently restored pier. There’s restaurants, bars, mini golf, ice cream stands, and The Silverball Museum, a pinball arcade full of vintage pinball machines where you pay by the hour! There’s also Asbury Lanes, a punk rock club that is also a bowling ally where $22 gets you unlimited bowling and admission to that evening’s show (a little steep for us, but a good deal for bowlers and music lovers).

Shirt: J Crew "Artist" T, Skirt: Brooklyn Industries, Worishofer Sandals, Sunglasses from in God We Trust (hah hah) in Brooklyn

The streets are bikeable and on a morning ride I relished taking deep breaths of the sea air and felt transported by the mixture of of salt, sunscreen, sand and honeysuckle carried on the breeze. No makeup, no fancy clothes, no plans, just jean shorts, bathing suits, and sunscreen. These days have been like a gift—because they were unexpected there’s no obligation and no expectations put on this time. It’s just mine to read, relax, enjoy my friends, eat simple food and relish a sliver of the good life close to home.

Beach and boardwalk cruiser (not mine, I brought my road bike from Brooklyn)

Strawhat and shorts (cut off by me!) both found in Arizona, Esther Williams bathing suit (love!)

The Utopia Project I: Vermont Studio Center

Posted on June 27, 2011 by killerfemme

Red Mill Building, Vermont Studio Center, Johnson, Vermont

Vermont Studio Center, Writing Studios, Johnson, Vermont

What compels an artist to create art? Is it internal or external? Is it the environment, inspiration from peers and community members, or simply having the space, time and opportunity to work? What environment is most nurturing to art and what type? Do artists create better in urban centers, buzzing with life, where their daily peregrinations and haphazard meetings can be the source of inspiration? Or do they need peace, quiet, solitude, nature and focus? While I live and work in the first set of circumstances (Brooklyn has the highest per capita of artists of New York’s five boroughs), I’m curious about the second. Specifically, the intentional artist’s community.

Roof of the wood and metal shop, Vermont Studio Center

This summer I am setting out to explore artist residencies, retreats or schools that have consciously built themselves away from urban environments. They are all situated in locations of surprising natural beauty, yet each has a particular history and offers artists a particular experience.

Bird houses, Vermont Studio Center

Swimming hole, Johnson Vermont, near the Vermont Studio Center

Places like MacDowell and Byrdcliffe reach back one hundred years or more, while others, like the Vermont Studio Center, reinvent the tradition. This summer I will be traveling to residencies, retreats, art schools and colonies in Vermont, New York State, New Hampshire and Maine, reaching out for work, but documenting these unique places for myself and for this project. I’m searching for insight into artistic inspiration, ideas about what binds an artistic community, and educating myself about an important tradition in the history of making art in the United States.

Deck of the Trustees House, Vermont Studio Center

Old Town Hall, Vermont Studio Center

My first stop was a seven hour drive north of New York City to Johnson, Vermont, which is practically on the Quebec border. I visited the Vermont Studio Center, which is a relative newcomer to the artist residency scene, and was founded by artists in 1984. Housed in a series of old mill buildings, and even the old town hall, the Studio Center integrates with the tiny town of Johnson. The residency itself is very independent—residents, who are visual artists and writers—come together for meals and studio visits, but that’s about it. Otherwise, they work in their studios and many of them work to keep the residency running. The residents themselves are diverse and hail from all parts of the world and are at all stages of their careers as artists. Serious, community oriented, independent, all set in a very tranquil northern landscape of lush hills, rivers and forests. While I’m generally unmoved by northern landscape (having grown up in one), the Vermont Studio Center felt like an escape for me as well. I hope one day to return as a resident.

Sign on the kitchen door, Vermont Studio Center

Inside the Red Mill, Vermont Studio Center

Night, Vermont Studio Center

Short Shorts Story

Posted on June 21, 2011 by killerfemme

Built by Wendy blouse, old Gap shorts, Campers sandals

Normally I really don’t like shorts. I think there was a stretch between age 18 and age 25 where I almost avoided wearing them entirely, though I’ll have to verify by looking at old photos. I usually skip over shorts for skirts and dresses, but when the thermometer rises above 80 degrees sometimes putting on the slightest sundress seems like the biggest effort. I crave simplicity and an outfit I don’t have to pause to consider, plus something that’s cool and functional. Enter shorts. I really hesitated to wear shorts to work, but decided I could dress them up with some heels or classy oxfords and a structural blouse or a white, slouchy, eyelet blazer. This blazer was my one concession to the summer trends, and I ordered it online from Built by Wendy. On sale, naturally. One thing that guarantees dressing up a simple summer outfit is red lipstick. J. (who graciously took these iPhone photos at work) said, “Hey, it’s cool, you’re not casual, you’re wearing lipstick.”

Built by Wendy slouchy eyelet blazer, Brooklyn Industries shorts, Vintage Eitenne Aigner oxfords

Where I really feel self conscious about shorts, however, is short shorts. When you have curves short shorts can be less than flattering. Sometimes they just make me look a whole lot wider. No one needs to see that part of my body like that, okay? But you know what, it was hot last Sunday and I was biking to Williamsburg for my weekly writing date so I thought I’d take a chance on these blue striped shorts I got from Built by Wendy (also on sale, see a pattern?). You know, it worked. Would I wear these to work? No, but I’ll feel comfortable rocking them at the cafe, the beach, the barbeque and in the park for the rest of the summer.

Petit Bateau t-shirt, Built by Wendy shorts, Sunglasses purchased and photo taken at In God We Trust in Greenpoint, Brooklyn using Instagram

Jouez vous au tennis? Non, pas de tout.

Posted on June 16, 2011 by killerfemme

I hate to say it, but I’ve never liked tennis. My mother and grandmother are ardent tennis fans and tried to teach me how to play it when I was little. I got mad because I couldn’t just hit the ball as hard as I wanted. At that point I was too young to understand that many sports are about controlled strength. Sensing my disinterest in the sport my mother tried to appeal to logic. “It’s a good skill to have,” she explained weakly. I think what she meant was that it was a good way to network with the wives of rich business people you or your husband may be trying to impress. This made me even less interested and brought out my disgust of WASP culture in general. Even as a small child I knew I wanted nothing to do with the dominant, upper-middle class New England elite. Not for me. So needless to say, I have not picked up a racket since the age of 9. However, this year I got sucked in to the excitement and drama of the French Open, or le tournoi de Roland Garros pour les francais. Will I watch Wimbledon and the US Open? Maybe, but what also got me interested was all of les filles whose blogs I love and their Roland Garros inspired style. Stephanie, of the Byglam blog, put together some really nice ensembles inspired by the tournament, and like I have done before, I bit her style a little bit in coming up with this summery, sporty get up. Also, just in case, I found this list of tennis terms in French to study for next year.

Ready for the courts

Keep your eye on the ball

Shirt: Built by Wendy, Skirt found at Housing Works, Bensimon sneakers, Nola Springtime bag by Les Composantes

On Being Intimidated To Start

Posted on June 14, 2011 by killerfemme

For my 30th birthday I made a resolution to start taking concrete steps towards my lifelong goal of being a writer. Besides all the research, outreach, planning and making connections that it entails, it also means sitting down, collecting my thoughts, and actually producing writing.

It feels incredibly self-indulgent, especially because I am also in graduate school and work full time, to write without a specific deadline or with an end result in mind. It seems like a real luxury to dwell in and focus on my own creativity. It’s scary to respect my ideas and creative impulses and take them seriously enough to give them time in my life. It’s ironic, because in my professional life I often act as a cheerleader or coach for artists, encouraging them to take their artistic ideas and careers seriously enough to push them to the next level. I also edit their grant proposals and project narratives and spend much time giving them feedback on their writing.

I’m at the beginning of a new decade and have a clear goal for the end, which is to be a writer in no uncertain terms. Deep down I know that only goal that has ever mattered to me and is the one that I will think about when I assess my life to see if I achieved what I hoped to. I’ve spent the past decade of my life ensuring my career as an arts administrator and I feel proud of that. However, as I spend my work days encouraging artists to trust in their visions it’s difficult to turn around and afford myself the same trust. I think these artists have given themselves the self confidence, and the permission, to trust in what they make and take it seriously. It’s hard to give myself the same permission. It’s much simpler to dwell on my own frustrations or feel like my goals are out of reach.

However, my goals will always be out of reach if I don’t start writing. If I don’t take the first steps to get organized, take a deep breath and push myself into the unknown, how will I even know what I want is possible?

Early Summer Celebrations

Posted on June 12, 2011 by killerfemme

Birthday outfit: Built by Wendy Dress, Nola Springtime bag by Les Composantes, Repetto shoes

Lately there have been so many celebrations: weddings, birthdays and the general happiness that comes with early summer. Finally long days and warm sun are here and we find as many excuses as possible to be outside and enjoy the season. It’s time to break out my favorite summer outfits and take some new ones for a spin.

Official wedding outfit: Brooklyn Industries dress, American Apparel tights, Robert Clergerie shoes

Another Brooklyn Industries dress for my birthday picnic. Photo by Andrea Patton.

Photo by Andrea Patton

Just a fun outfit for work: Vera scarf, J Crew t-shirt, rad black skirt bought in Berlin, Dolce Vita shoes

Being a blogger having been a zinester wanting to become a writer

Posted on June 1, 2011 by killerfemme

The other week I went to the Brooklyn Bloggers meetup at the Bell House with my friend Laura of the blog Eating the Beats. It was my first time going to an event consciously as a “blogger,” and despite having written on Killerfemme for the past few years I’ve been hesitant to really identify as being a blogger versus simply being a person who has a blog. All told, the Brooklyn Blog meetup was fun. I talked to bloggers who write about New York nachos, tech and gadgets from a girl’s perspective, writers for Broeklyn, and a brave young woman who writes about being broke and navigating New York’s dating scene. It was nice to hear people’s interesting ideas and find out about how they are crafting their blogs. However, I also feel like I’ve come to blogging too late to really get into it without seeing the bold commercialism that is behind so many blogs now. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but blogs are often seen as a means to another end, which is fine, if that’s your goal. While I too would love a book contract and/or a regular byline, I don’t necessarily think my personal blog will be my ticket to my dreams as a writer.

Mostly I feel like I haven’t found my blogging “community” yet. Perhaps it’s because of the vastness of the blogosphere (if we can even call it that anymore), but I don’t feel like I’ve found bloggers who share my ideas, values and aesthetics. In fact, most of the blogs I read are in French. While I thoroughly enjoy those blogs, it’s hard to connect with those writers when I write in a different language, even if I comment on their entries en francais.

This made me think back to when I started making my personal zine Induglence in 1998. When I first encountered zines I knew immediately that I would make one myself. The concept of publishing one’s own personal writing made sense to me innately, especially as a teenager, because I knew that I could not expect anyone else to publish my work. Perhaps because I knew exactly the kind of writers I wanted to connect with—I would describe them loosely as young feminists interested in art, queer politics, and music—it was easier for me to immerse myself in the zine community. I felt like over the course of two or so years I was able to build up an audience for my zine and also a network of close friends, penpals and fellow zinesters that I felt I shared something in common with. My connection to and beleif in the power of the zine network extended into helping found the Portland Zine Symposium in 2001. It continues to resonate into my adult life because some of my closest friends (and neighbors) are women I met through zines over 10 years ago.

Perhaps its because I have close friends now that I don’t feel the same urgency to seek out people to connect with through blogs. However, I also feel like I am writing in a vacuum, and some days that makes me wonder if I should even continue to bother with this blog. Keeping a blog (and keeping it up more regularly and diligently) has reminded me about the whole reason I started making zines and keeping a blog to begin with: to write. Being a writer has been my dream ever since I was a little girl and it is something I am determined to make a reality in my thirties. I know it’s harder now than ever to distinguish oneself, one’s voice, one’s ideas, and one’s blog (especially if I don’t have hundreds of dollars and hours to sink into the design and hosting of it), but I also feel like its much easier for me to find opportunities to publish and connect with wider audiences nowadays. For me, I feel like blogging and writing for other web-based publications holds a lot of promise. We’ll see what the future will bring.

Hopefully in the next decade I'll be able to write a better novel than Ida the cat.

Girl from the North Country

Posted on May 30, 2011 by killerfemme

The other weekend I went “home” to Maine for the wedding of one of my best friends from childhood and to celebrate my birthday with my parents. Like most people I have a complicated relationship with home. My current home is in Brooklyn, New York and probably will be for the foreseeable future (unless someone wants to offer me a job in Paris or London, hint hint). But usually when I refer to “home,” I mean Maine, where I grew up and where my parents still live. When I was a teenager I couldn’t wait to get out of Maine and transform myself into a bohemian urbanite. I am the first to admit I had romantic ideas about what life in the city would be like, and not a lot of idea about the heartache and hard work it would actually entail. As the years that I have lived in New York City go by I become more comfortable with where I am from, but I also don’t feel like I need to flaunt it. Accepting my home is also about accepting who I am and how it has shaped me.

Dressed up for the wedding at Hawk Ridge Farm. Brooklyn Industries dress and sweater, American Apparel tights, Robert Clergerie shoes

After the ceremony the bride and groom lead us through the pasture to the reception.Of course, being Maine the weather was something to contend with, but we're used to it.

Nola Springtime bag by Les Compasantes (a birthday present to myself), American Apparel marine sweater, Ben Simon sneakers

Hanging out with Sonny. I borrowed my Dad's jacket.

On top of Bradbury Mountain, my favorite place to walk when I'm home.

Maine springtime "color block."

Skirty Spring

Posted on May 16, 2011 by killerfemme

Vintage Vera scarf, H&M Skirt, Ellips Shoes

Oh my, it’s finally spring. I can finally break out some old favorites and take skirts I got at thrift stores and clothing swaps in the past few weeks out for a trial run. Now that it’s not so cold I could also pair them with some of my very favorite pairs of shoes, many inspired by my favorite French bloggers. Thanks to my obliging co-workers for the pictures!